An original Football Guru since the league’s very first season in 2004. Twenty-two years later, Jordan is still here… mostly as a cautionary tale.

Career record: 113-180. That’s not a typo. He officially owns the all-time record for most losses in league history, a title no one is exactly fighting him for. He’s made six playoff appearances (last one in 2020) and has the hardware to show for it: one second-place finish and three thirds. Close, but no cigar… repeatedly.

Jordan’s résumé includes several 8-5 seasons that briefly gave the league hope, a solid 9-4 campaign in 2020, and then the kind of recent form that makes you check if his team is still active (1-13 in both 2023 and 2025). His personal high-water mark remains a glorious 180.32-point explosion in 2020. His low? A tragic 25-point outing that somehow still feels on-brand.

Through it all, he’s kept one of the league’s longest-running rivalries alive against John. They’ve played nearly 40 times. It’s been close. Jordan’s still looking for the upper hand.

A true lifer. Just… maybe don’t draft him in your confidence pool.